Ain't love grand?

When I was younger, I had a black Labrador retriever named Pepper. Greatest dog ever. I got him for Christmas when I was 2 years old and grew up with that dog by my side.  I adored him. And I thought I knew what love was....
Until I had my first "boyfriend" in middle school. We never went on a date, held hands or really even talked to each other, but I thought I knew what love was....
Until I had my first high school relationship. We went on dates and hung out.  And I thought I knew what love was....
Until I met Marty.  We had an instant connection to each other and even when we were "just friends," I always wondered what it would be like if we were dating.  Then he asked me to be his girlfriend.  And I was convinced I knew what love was....
Until we had been together for a few years and he got down on one knee in front of hundreds of people at Disney World and asked me to be his wife.  I was so full of emotion, I thought my heart would explode.  And I thought I knew what love was....
Until I walked down an aisle, my dad's arm linked in mine, anxiously waiting to recite my vows and become Mrs. Marty Gaddie.  I was a crazy, don't see anyone but him, head over heels newlywed.  And I thought I knew what love was...
Until we got through our first year of marriage together.  We went through ups, downs, fights, date nights and building a home together.  And I thought I knew what love was....
Until I saw him hold our child.  Knowing that God put this man in my life and blessed us with this beautiful child, who is a perfect combination of us both overwhelms me daily.  Watching Marty with our baby girl is enough to bring me to tears and makes my heart swell with joy.  The love I have for her is indescribable and completely different than any love I've felt before.  And I'm convinced.  THIS has to be what love is.

Super mommy, where are you?

I've got my cape on and I'm ready to.....oh wait, hold on....it's on backwards. There. Now I'm ready to tackle...crap. Is that a stain? I guess it needs to be washed. Let me lay it in one of fifteen piles of dirty clothes in my laundry room. Maybe I'll wash it later, after I do a load of baby clothes of course. Which reminds me, I need to sanitize Avery's pacifer, since I forgot to pick up paci wipes at the store.....where is that stupid pacifer? I thought I put it right here by my five empty water cups sitting on the nightstand....maybe it's here under the bed......so that's what happened to my other gray sock! Gosh. I really should vacuum under there. Do I remember where the vacuum is? I think it's in the laundry room. Geez, that reminds me! I have to wash baby clothes!
I knew I was going to be able to be "super mom." You know the type--the mom that always volunteers for everything, looking completely polished and put together while her baby sported an adorable outfit with a matching bib and hairbow? The one that bragged about her job, ability to make lasagna noodles from scratch, all while keeping a spotless house and documenting every single second of her child's life? That was going to be me. I would lay in bed at night and rub my big pregnant belly and smile, thinking of all the of the amazing things I would do as super mommy. The craft projects we'd create. The organizational tips I would implement. The super strict, but loving discipline I would enforce. The bedtime routine I would establish. The homemade dinners I would make. The clothes I would clean. The clean house I would manage. It was going to be amazing. People have babies all the time and they manage to make it work, right? And then I woke up. I look back at that pregnant me of 4 months ago and laugh my butt off. Super mommy? How about super messy? On a typical day off with my baby girl, I struggle to find time to run to the bathroom by myself before she screams to be entertained. Discipline has gone out the window, as I attend to her every whimper. My laundry room is source of fear for me now....my own personal version of hell. I walk in and the clothes practically taunt me--"A super mommy would have had us washed WEEKS ago. You're out of clean towels? You're a failure." My dishes are piled up in my sink. I no longer have a visible kitchen table top. My Halloween pumpkins are decorated, but didn't even make it out onto the porch. Clothes are everywhere, shoes are scattered, and my car looks like a homeless family has been living in it for months. Where are you super mommy? I look at myself and wonder how other people do it. How does my sister-in-law manage her 3 and 1 year old and watch Avery twice a week? How did my mother work a full time job with three kids under the age of 8--one with a heart defect and in need of extra attention? How did my Meemaw have SIX children in a row, while helping my Peepaw on the farm and always manage to have a homecooked lunch and dinner ready every day? How did my Granny also have SIX children, while following my Papaw around the country as a military family and get all six children readjusted and manage a home? What's my problem?? Why can't I handle an adorable, yet slighty needy, three month old and do all of those things that I set out to do? My blog is the ultimate testiment to my inability to multitask. I don't even remember the last time I was able to sit down and blog. I'm writing this after my sweet baby has gone to bed....the ONLY time of day I seem to be able to get anything done. Is this what I'm going to be reduced to? Washing clothes by the light of the moon and cleaning my room, while tiptoeing around the bassinet that holds my sleeping baby? If that's what I have to do, then so be it. I need a reality check. Repeat after me: my house is not clean and I'm okay with that. Repeat as needed. Next: it will probably be SEVERAL months, if not years, before you have time for the little projects and "super mommy"-ish things you had planned. This is okay. Keeping Avery fed, clean and occupied should be your number one priority now. I wanted to be that mom that was able to have a happy baby, a spotless house and dinner on the table every night. But I'm hanging up my cape for now. Because there certainly isn't anything wrong with a happy baby, a messy house and a Hot Pocket every now and then.

iTunes Alternative for iOS 5 and iPhone 4S

CopyTrans Manager - the free iTunes replacement has been updated lately and is now fully compatible with iOS 5 and iPhone 4S. The download is available on the following page:

• iTunes replacement

Most important functions at a glance:

• Copy videos, ringtones, music and more from PC to iPhone, iPod or iPad
• Create iPhone playlists
• Remove and delete tracks from playlists and your iPhone library
• Change ID3 tags using the Tag Editor
• Automatically search for missing artwork
• Enjoy your iPhone music using the integrated music player

Just because.

I suddenly know the difference between Pampers, Luvs and Huggies and the pros and cons of each. Because I'm a diaper-conscious mommy. At 3 am, I can easily locate a pacifier, clean diaper, receiving blanket and Destin cream by just the light of the TV. Because I'm a sleep-deprived, but learning to function on 4ish hours of sleep mommy. I believe my little girl is the most beautiful and perfect baby I've ever seen. Because I'm a biased mommy. I used to be the type that had to have complete silence and darkness before I could go to sleep, but have now learned to sleep with the TV on and a sound machine loudly playing the sounds of ocean waves. Because I'm a mommy that would listen to a police siren if it would help my baby sleep. I come close to crying tears of happiness when my baby girl is crying and I pick her up and she immediately stops and sighs like being in my arms is her favorite place. Because I'm Avery's mommy. I lay awake at night and watch my baby sleeping, wondering what she's dreaming and watching her little chest rise and fall to make sure she's breathing right. Because I'm a mommy that worries. With every little cough and unexpected rash, I worry that she's getting sick and wonder what I can do to make sure she's always safe and healthy. Because I'm an overprotective mommy. I love hearing about other people's journeys through motherhood and welcome advice on how to keep my baby healthy and happy. Because I'm a new mommy. I walk through stores and am immediately drawn to the adorable baby clothes, even though I know she has a closet full of them at home. Because I'm a fashionable mommy. Even though I love having her here, I miss being able to feel her kicking my belly and always knowing where she is and that she's safe. Because I'm a formerly pregnant mommy. I will probably bore you to death with stories about my baby from now until the time she's 10. Because I'm a ridiculously proud mommy. I hate to argue with any of you that think your job is the best, but you're wrong. Mine is. Because I'm a mommy.

My crazy new life

Life. Is. Crazy. I'd heard it, but kind of blew off any advice that a newborn changes your life completely. Yes, I knew that it was going to happen, but when people would tell me that things were going to change, I just kind of had the nonchalant attitude of "Duh, I know." But trust me, until you're actually living it, until you go through hours of labor and have this little person given to you that you're completely and totally responsible for, you have absolutely NO idea. You have no idea what it's like to sit up at night and worry "Did she eat enough?" "Can she breathe?" "Is she too hot/cold/bundled up/not bundled enough??" Life has completely changed. My living room used to be (for the most part) organized and somewhat clean--focused on decorations and function. Now my living room has been taken over by a 2 week old baby. A bouncy seat, pack n play, swing, bassinet, various baby items are strewn throughout the room. Forget decoration or function. My main goal is now keeping her happy and keeping her things within reach. My entire adult life, I have been on a mission to keep my nails grown out and healthy. The day I went into labor, my nails were perfectly shaped, manicured and all a uniform length. They were perfect. Then Avery arrives with her delicate skin that can be easily scratched by my beautiful nails. Needless to say, the nails were quickly cut down to a very short, very ugly, but very safe for baby length. My days used to be filled with projects, paintings, cleaning and other humdrum activites. Now, my days are filled with diapers, feedings and quick cat naps in between feedings. Nothing else matters except my baby girl and keeping her happy, fed and clean. My thoughts are filled with the last time Avery ate, when I should be taking my medicine, how many diapers we have left in stock and where I placed the Destin cream the last time I used it. If it doesn't relate to my baby, the thought has completely been pushed out of my brain. I no longer worry about what I'm wearing for the day. I throw on a pair of maternity pants and a top that's easy to nurse in and turn my thoughts to which cute outfit baby Avery will be wearing. My alarm clock has been replaced with a baby cry. My cell phone homepage was once filled with games and social media apps. Those have quickly been replaced with a notepad featuring baby's feeding schedule and apps that create white noise to help her sleep. So, to all you soon to be mommies out there....your life is going to change. You'll hear it a hundred times between now and the time that your baby arrives, but I promise, it's all for the better.

How to manage iPhone without iTunes?

You may already know, that you don't have to use iTunes to manage iPod, iPhone or iPad. When searching for iTunes Alternatives it's very likely that you'll find a dozen of apps promising to manage your iPhone independently from iTunes. The software that I use is called CopyTrans Manager and you can find it here:

Free iTunes replacement to manage iPhone without iTunes


So far, so good. Did you also know that iPhone, iPod Touch and iPad require drivers to be recognized by your PC? These drivers are installed with a fresh copy of iTunes, meaning you need to install iTunes, QuickTime etc. to use your iPhone with your PC. As many people consider iTunes to be bloatware, you may wish to use your iPhone without having to install iTunes. That's why you can use the CopyTrans Drivers Installer.

This little free app installs all drivers and you'll finally be able to use your iPhone entirely without iTunes.

Gliders and rockers and chairs, oh my!

Who knew that the hardest part of putting together a baby nursery would be finding the "right" glider to match the decor?? I thought, in my naive little world, that picking out the crib and coordinating furniture would be the most difficult decision I would make. Turns out, that was the easiest. I immediately fell in love with our nursery furniture. Black, classic, gender neutral=perfect. Next step was to find a rocking chair or glider for those late night feedings, bedtime story readings and lullaby singing that Avery and I will be doing in the very near future. I searched online websites, again having a "vision" in my head of exactly what I wanted. And darn it if I didn't find it. Very quickly, I might add.

It's completely gorgeous. I love this chair. No, really. I LOVE this chair. "So buy it!" I hear you say...."what's the problem?" The problem is the price of this little chair. The chair of my dreams is a whopping $449. And that's just the chair. The ottoman (because, of course, I want to kick my feet up and relax after a long day at work) is sold separately, tacking on another $125 to the already steep price tag. I literally have arguments with myself over this chair. I constantly go back and forth over whether or not I should spend that kind of money on a daggone chair. The war in my head goes a little something like this:

"I love this chair."
"I do not love the price."
"It's sooooooooo pretty. It's definitely a chair that I would use after Avery's outgrown the rock-me-to-sleep stage."
"The price isn't that pretty."
"This chair is so unique...have you seen it in anyone else's nursery or home??"
"Of course not. No one else is crazy enough to spend that kind of money!"
*pouty face* "But I waaaaant it."
"Sorry, you need to spend that money on more practical things like bottles and diapers."
*sigh*

This conversation takes place probably once a week. I go to Target's website, look at the chair, decide I want it, click on it to add it to my cart and then feel an overwhelming sense of guilt. Yes, we got Target gift cards for our baby showers and could apply that money towards the chair. But then I think of all the things that we could buy with the gift cards instead....a set of organizational bins for her closet, more bottles, more diapers (because Lord knows you can never have enough). As always, my more practical side always wins out and I click out of Target and do (yet another) extensive google search on gliders. I search and I search. I click on less attractive, but soooooooo much cheaper gliders and wonder if they have the ability to re-upholstered. Then you're looking at the cost of fabric. And trying to find someone that can accomplish the task of re-upholstering glider cushions. And the time spent to wait for the glider to be shipped to me and the cushions to be done (and, as of today, we're talking 35 short days away from my due date). And then I get overwhelmed, click out of the websites completely and continue my nursery chair-less day. I'm beginning to think that labor will be easier than picking out this stupid chair......