There are no words.

Remember my post from a few weeks ago where I organized the master bedroom closet? And I promised you pictures of my disgustingly horrible office/craft room/junk room. *deep breath*(I'm just gonna throw this out there....I must realllllly love you guys if I'm about to show you the following pictures. That, or I have temporarily lost my mind).

Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh. I hear you now, because it's the same question I asked myself every single day: How did it ever get like this?? I wish I could say that I have no idea. But I do...and her name is Avery. You see, when Marty and I were just a little family of two, had a three bedroom home. One master bedroom and two bedrooms for us to have individually to store our junk. When we found out that our Avery was on the way, one room had to be cleared out and condensed into two. I love our little house, but I would KILL for more storage. My next home will have closets everywhere you look. We have the problem of too much stuff, not enough places to put it all. Hence, the disgusting room. Any time someone would come to visit our adorable newborn, things would be thrown in the office. I eventually quit painting (something I hope to be able to pick up again) and all of my painting supplies and canvases lay haphazardly around the room. My dresses and coats are in the office closet, some hung up, some laying in the floor or draped across the back of the chair. Boxes thrown in, Christmas wrapping paper lay in the floor, Marty's weight bench blocked much of the walking area in the room. It just continued to pile up, making the room worse and worse. I was beginning to worry that we'd be candidates for the hit TLC show "Hoarding: Buried Alive." Over the last two months, I attempted to tackle the overwhelming mess. I would walk in, move a few things around, become short of breath and panicky and have to walk out. My office was causing me to have a panic attack on a daily basis, literally. The funny thing is, as bad as the above pictures look, it got worse. You know how they say to get an area cleaned and organized, you have to make a bigger mess first? That happened. In my attempts to de-clutter, I made a bigger mess. It was an insurmountable project. The mess was so big, I didn't ever know where to start. So I hadn't.

Until this week. Dayna, my middle sister, is in the big kid world and has gone and bought herself a house. An adorable little house that came with this incredibly awesome corner desk. I love my little wicker desk because it has traveled with me from home to college to married/adulthood, but it's outgrown its usefulness. The desk at Dayna's house would be perfect. Best part? Dayna doesn't need it. It's too big and bulky for the room that she'll be using as her office. So we're trading off. She gets the wicker desk, I get the corner one. I was pumped. Until I thought about my office. Where is it going to go? How will we get it in? How will I get the office cleaned in time for it to go into the room? I doubt Dayna would be willing to wait the 6 months it would take me to completely clean the room the way I wanted it. This afternoon, I got a few wonderful hours to myself at home....and I did it. I tackled the junk room. But not in the way I thought I would. Instead of cleaning the room piece by piece, which would probably take DAYS (maybe even weeks) to do, I cleared the room out. I utilized every laundry basket, box and storage tote we own and piled up with stuff and took it out of the room. The room looks empty and amazing......but now the rest of my house doesn't.

Excuse me, I need to go have an anxiety attack right now.

I'm back. Holy crap. What have I done?!?! If you don't want to by my friend anymore, I totally understand. *inhale* *exhale* I know this is the most effective way for me to get my craft room back to its former glory. If I am able to control the items that go back into the room and put it back in a clutter-free and completely organized way, I know that it's going to be a million times better than just making all of the mess I had fit the room. This way, I'll be able to go through each box and bag and label each piece: keep, toss, donate, yard sale. Less will be going in, more will be going out, and I'll FINALLY be able to breathe (and hopefully paint!) again. I posted these pictures in the hopes that, by putting them out there for everyone to see, I will be held accountable to clean the room and make it awesome again. If you would, my faithful blog followers (are there really any of you out there???) gently remind me every once in a while or inquire about the status of this room. That way, I know I'll have to get it clean--at least for the sake of another blog post. If you'll excuse me, I have to go breathe into a brown paper bag now.

Rantings. And LOTS of them.

{Warning. I am going to be complaining. I don't need judgement. I just need to vent. This is more for me than for anyone else to actually read, so it's probably going to be a jumbled mess of angry rantings. You've been warned.}

I have a zombie baby. One who has decided that sleep, unfortunately, just isn't for her, no matter what kind of sleep training techniques or bedtime routines her mommy and daddy try. And we're not just talking not sleeping at nighttime. That, I could almost handle. We're talking not sleeping...EVER. She's a notorious catnapper. Ten to twenty minutes later, she's awake. You rock her to sleep when you see that rare window of opportunity when she begins to rub her eyes and show signs of sleepiness. But don't even dare try to lay her down. She has a magic sensor that alerts her body when someone is no longer holding her and those sweet little brown eyes fly right open. No matter how tired she is or how little sleep she got the night before. She WILL NOT sleep unassisted. She has to have help going to sleep and staying asleep. The going to sleep thing, I can handle. I love rocking her and singing her a variety of bedtime lullabies and watching as she can't fight anymore and sleep overcomes her. Those moments, I cherish. It's the moments when she cries the second I lay her in her crib or on a mat in the floor are the ones that are about to drive me bananas. For the most part, I had come to terms with the fact that Avery never sleeps. Until this morning. The last three nights, Avery has been up almost every single hour and laid in her bed and whined. Not really cried, which lets me know that she isn't in pain or needing to be comforted, just whined. Like "Someone please come get me because I sound so pathetic and I know you can't stand it" whined. And for the past two nights, I've ignored her. (when I say ignored, I mean laid by the monitor and listened to every noise she made, but didn't go to her). Last night, however, was a different story. After several hours of waking, whining and falling back asleep, Avery thought that 4:30 am was an appropriate time to wake up and start really crying. Just enough to get my attention to make me think that she didn't feel good or needed to be attended to. So I got up, went in her room and got her out of her bed, thinking that I could rock her back to sleep. Fifteen minutes later, I still had a wide-eyed baby that had no intention of going back to sleep in her crib. So I made the mistake that I'm sure a lot of sleep-deprived mommies make....I put her in our bed. I swore, from the moment I found out that we were expecting, that our babies would not sleep in our bed. I didn't want to find ourselves, five years down the road, with a toddler still sleeping in between. But sometimes, in the wee hours of the morning when you would do almost anything to get a few hours of sleep, you're not thinking 100% clearly. I laid her down, thinking the warmth of our bed and her laying in between us would immediately put her back to sleep. Wrong. She laid in our bed....and played. She reached for my pajama top, my nose, my hair, the blanket--anything she could get her hands on and play with. She rolled from Marty's side to mine. She flipped over, she sighed, she popped her pacifier in and out of her mouth. Basically, she did everything BUT sleep. Soon, I found myself facing 6 am and time to shower and start the day....all without a single wink of sleep since 4:30. I gave her a bottle and placed her beside Marty, thinking that she'd keep him awake and demand early morning playtime or episodes of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. So I showered and fought to stay awake. I applied my makeup and fixed my hair. All was well until my dryer bumped the display board where I have all of my earrings and down went all of my earrings in the sink. As I picked up the pairs of earrings, I found only one lone earring belonging to my favorite pair....meaning the other probably went right down the drain. And I lost it. I stood in my bathroom and cried. Over a $5 pair of fake pearl studs. I knew it was less about the earrings (which could be easily replaced with a trip to Claire's or another equally cheap jewelry place) and more about the fact that my baby's sleep issues make me feel like a complete and utter failure. What have I done, or haven't done, to get her to this current pattern of sleeplessness that she's in?? Did I baby her too much as a newborn? Did I hold her too much? Show her too much attention? Rock her to sleep too long when she should have been laid in her crib as soon as her bedtime routine was over? Which, in turn, made me angry. Why should it always be my fault? Why should it be something that I did, or didn't do, to cause something as huge as these ridiculous sleep issues? I shook off these feelings, finished drying my hair and walked out of the bathroom to get dressed...only to find my 7 month old curled up to her daddy....sound asleep. Which started another fit of crying. Why me? Why will she go to sleep just fine for Marty, but seems dead-set against getting a good night's sleep for my sake? It wasn't always like this. When Avery was about 10 weeks old, she was sleeping at least 8 hours through the night. I was incredibly thankful. Each night that I would lay down and wake 6 hours later without a peep was a restful and wonderful night. Then, Avery caught a cold. Stuffy noses and a whiny baby became our nightly routine and I thought we'd never get back to that blissful state of restfulness we were in before. Until Marty and I started Avery on a pretty strict bedtime routine. At 7 pm, on the dot, we were beginning her routine which started with a bottle and cereal and ended with a bath and lotion-y massage. For awhile, that worked. She would sleep from 8-5 consistently for about 2 weeks. Then she got an ear infection and broncholitis and spent an entire week in our bed propped up on pillows so I could make sure she was still breathing through the night. Which brings us to our current state. The routine is still the same...filling that little tummy and then a bath and lotion before bed, but the results have been far different than they were before. But no one else in the house seems to be affected by this sleeplessness, other than me. Avery is a happy baby...seemingly unaware as to how awesome sleep is and the fact that most babies her age should be getting 10-18 hours of sleep a day. We're lucky if we get 18 hours in two. Marty, while extremely helpful whenever I ask him to get out of bed and tend to her, has the remarkable ability to sleep through anything and usually doesn't hear her crying at night. There have been a few times that he'll stir when she's really wailing, but he can always roll over and go right back to sleep. And I'm envious...and a little bit angry...and a lot bit resentful. Anger is now my #1 emotion...if I'm being completely honest with myself. In fact, more than once during this frustrating morning, I had to refrain from punching my snoring husband. And why? I'm exhausted and want sleep more than anything...why on earth would I begrudge anyone of getting their own 6-8 hours of sleep a night? But when I'm in the middle of being sleep-deprived, I don't think of things like that. I think of how jealous I am that he gets to sleep and how I want to be the one that's drooling on my pillow. I've become this irrationally angry person that I don't even like being around. I get mad over clothes left in the laundry room or a dish left on the table. Things that absolutely don't matter in the long run. But rational thinking and an even-temper have completely left me. And I have no idea how to get them back. I resolve to be a nicer person and to control my emotions when it's no one's fault that I'm so tired, but I can't. I go right back to being the snappy, hormonal, momasarus I was before. Not to mention the fact that I have become a blithering idiot. I can't think of words that I'm wanting to say, I lose my train of thought at the drop of a hat and if it's not written down or I'm not reminded 5 times or more, I will forget things. My co-worker probably thinks I'm the dumbest person in the world. I feel like I'm on this vicious merry-go-round: Avery doesn't sleep=I don't sleep=I blame myself=I feel like a failure=I get angry=Avery still doesn't sleep...the cycle continues. I want it to stop. I want my baby to sleep. Forget all of my issues for a second...how is she functioning?? If a baby is supposed to be getting 10-18 hours and she's getting maybe 7 the entire day, how is that good for her? If she doesn't take naps, is she a burden to anyone that watches her? I know I'm barely able to get things done on the weekends because she refuses to be left alone and she doesn't nap...do other people resent the fact that they have to stay right by her side the entire time they're babysitting her? In fact, this very issue lost us a regular weekly babysitter. One who had children of her own that needed her attention, which is how is should be, and my whiny baby was beginning to interfere with that. Which makes me feel like a terrible mom. No one likes to hear that their baby cried all day and didn't let the babysitter get anything done. I don't want to be THAT mom. I just don't know what else to do. We've tried crying it out. It worked for a little while, but now she's up all the time just crying. What do I do? Go to her every hour that she's crying and rock her back to sleep? But then doesn't that teach her that she needs me to comfort her before she enters any state of sleep? Do I let her cry every single time through the entire night? But doesn't that teach her that nighttime isn't an enjoyable time because she knows she'll lay in her crib and cry? Why isn't there a clear answer? I can handle all the ifs of mommyhood...if she'll be succesful, if she'll hit her milestones on time, if she'll be healthy and happy...but this is one issue that I just want the magic answer. Don't get me wrong, if there's a good reason to lose sleep, my Avery girl would be the best one. But I would like the magic formula to get my baby to sleep through the night and get my home to return to some type of order and the old, pleasant Devan back. I guess until then, I just have to keep repeating that "this too shall pass...."

Worrywart.

Out of all my character flaws (and I have many--impatience, temper, pouting when things don't go my way), my worrying is the worst. I have the innate ability to worry about anything and everything. I'll take anything, which can start as something very small, and worry about it until it becomes a very large and overwhelming situation. I can't help it. I worry about Avery CONSTANTLY--is she happy? Is she being fed okay? What if she's allergic to every fruit I give her for the rest of her life (the current list is bananas and pears)? Is this current I-need-you-all-the-time, whiny stage of her life caused by something I did...or didn't...do? Will she ever get back on a sleep schedule again?? I worry about myself--am I a good enough mom? Will I ever learn how to balance Avery and a home? Will I find time to paint again? Am I destined to be a zombie mom? I worry about my husband and my family--about their health, happiness and relationship with me. I worry about my relationship with God--is it strong enough? Do I pray enough? What is God going to say to me when He gets the chance? I even worry about worrying too much! I've always been this way. When invited to high school parties or to friend's houses whose parents were gone for the night, I declined their invitations because I worried that my dad would know the next door neighbors and they'd see my car at the party. Sometimes I wonder if I've been this way since birth. But it's Lent. And if I could truly give anything up, it wouldn't be Dr. Peppers for 40 days or facebook. It would be worrying. Since I know that isn't a realistic, I am going to make it my Lenten goal to worry LESS. For 40 days (and hopefully longer), I will worry less and enjoy more. I will give my problems over to God instead of thinking that I'm big enough to handle everything on my own. It shows my own lack of faith in believing that my worrying will solve anything instead of handing the problem immediately over to God and relying on Him to help me through. I will print off these quotes and place them where I can read them and remind myself daily that I need not worry. And hopefully by the end of this Lenten season, I'll be a worry-free(ish) and happier me. :)

Nerd alert

I {LOVE} school supplies. Give me a $100 and the choice of spending it at either Office Depot or JC Penney, and I'm more than likely going to choose the office supply store. It could be that it takes me back to my childhood and preparing for the first day of school. I loved being able to show off my new Trapper Keeper or Lisa Frank pencil case. Maybe it's the fact that I love to draw and create things, and stores like Office Depot and Staples help me do things like that. Or maybe it's just the absolutely, not a pencil out of place, organized perfection that is displayed in those stores. Everything is catergorized, alphabetized and easy to find. My kind of store. You see, I'm an organizational nerd. I consider myself to be pretty darn good at organizing. In fact, I think I could be a professional organizer (as long as people didn't have a problem with me throwing their crap away). There's little that makes me feel better than taking what was once an chaotic mess and turning it into a beautifully organized COMPLETED project. And therein lies my problem. Having a beautiful 6 month old that is going through a "I-need-you-please-don't-leave-the-room-or-I'll-scream" stage makes it very hard to complete any project that I begin. At night, I sit on Pinterest and browse pages and pages of organizing tips and projects....and I drool and sigh with envy. They look amazing. And effective. Unfortunately, I can't find the time to implement these projects. I want to be THIS woman. However, I have accepted the fact that I will not have a clean house until my daughter can entertain herself and can come looking for me whenever I walk out of the room (instead of screaming at the top of her lungs until I come back) and organization just be darned. But I did get a tiny little organizational fix this weekend. My parents decided to come visit our house in Bardstown since we were keeping our sickly little baby inside. If you're anything like me, you know that a visit from the parents calls for an immediate and all-encompasing clean sweep of the house. Not that I think my mom or dad would judge me (I do have a baby, afterall), I just don't want them to think that they raised a complete and total slob incapable of loading the dishwasher or providing clean clothes for her family. After a wonderful lunch and visit with my family, our house was empty again......and finally clean. And it. felt. amazing. I hadn't realized that I could breathe better when my house was picked up. I had forgotten what it was like to have a vacuumed living room rug or a 409-ed bathroom counter. Before I put the baby to bed, I looked at my husband with pleading eyes and said "Can we pleeeease keep the house looking like this???" He agreed that it was much nicer having a clutter-free(ish) house. I was so inspired that after little Miss "Sleep is for babies (and by babies I mean ones other than me)" to bed, I went in to tackle our master closet. Don't get me wrong. I love.love.love having a walk-in closet. But, as it is with any other space in our home, the more area you have, the bigger the potential mess. Before pictures:

I'm aware that this doesn't look all THAT bad. It was. I promise. Pictures just don't do this one justice.

I'm ashamed at the number of shoes I have. I'm pretty sure that could be considered a sin. *sigh* My winter boot collection is a huge source of unorganized stress for me. Currently, they were shoved under my hanging clothes so you couldn't see them and they weren't in the way when you walked in the closet. Which was okay, but anytime I wanted to wear boots, I would have to pull all pairs out into the middle of the floor, find the two that matched and then push the remaining pairs back. Repeat process EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. Annoying, right?

My closet wasn't overly messy like some of the other areas of my house...but it still made me feel frustrated because I saw the potential for organization. So I put my head down and started clearing out. I weeded through my clothing...again. I probably go through my closet and toss old clothes out 4 or 5 times a year. More so now that my weight has completely see-sawed over the course of a year. I attempted to bring order to Marty's clothing without messing with them too much. I organized. I tossed. I un-hung and re-hung. And finally, I was done.

Am I a total nerd? Can you even tell a difference? Shoot. Well, that's okay. Because I can. And the finished product looks awesome....in person. I promise. :)

Again. Nerd alert. I threw out all mis-matched hangers in the closet and opted to keep all of the plastic covered black and white and clear hangers you get at the department store. Best part? No more wire hangers!



My gianto tub of purses. I realize there's probably a better solution for storing and organizing these, but this works for now. And it keeps them all in one place. I can deal with that.


My pride and joy.....clutter-free shoes. I saw an idea on Pinterest (of course, right?) where you take skirt/pant hangers and use them to hang flip flops in your closet. Well, you saw my dilemma above with all my winter boots. So I modified the Pinterest idea and used the hangers to hold all my boots. Genius. I was afraid that the little clips on the hangers wouldn't be strong enough to hold my heavy boots, but we're on day 3 and they're still hanging in there. :)

Finally, my giveaway/yard sale pile. In 45 minutes of going through my closet and tossing a reorganizing, I got rid of the following things:

• NINE pairs of shoes (don't judge.)
• two purses
• two old pillows that had lost their "fluffiness"
• 15 shirts

and!

• three pairs of size 10 and 8 post-pregnancy Old Navy jeans that are now too big. :)

Is there anything better than having a little slice of organized heaven in a normally chaotic home? I say nope. :)))

Next project: my office. Note: you should probably prepare yourselves. I'm currently having a mini-panic attack just talking about it. Please. Don't judge me.

It's my baby and I'll cry if I want to.

If you follow me on facebook, you might have seen my status from a few days ago: "Devan Gaddie attemped to let Avery cry it out last night. It will NEVER happen again. I may be a wuss, but I couldn't listen to my baby crying for more than 10 minutes before I was crying myself. Guess I just have to accept my fate as a mommy of a 5 month old that gets up multiple times a night!"

I guess I can call myself a liar. I did it again. After many hours of research and talking to other mommies (including my own), I embarked on night 2 of "Letting Avery Cry it Out" a.k.a. "Trying to Distract Myself with the iPad While Sitting in Avery's Floor Listening to Her Cry it Out." Horrible. For the first two nights, Avery cried for an hour and a half....I cried for an hour. I tried everything to distract myself: playing on Pinterest (I DID find some great organizational ideas), listening to music, writing letters (I re-read them the next morning and tossed them when they were filled with sleep-deprived gibberish). I would sit in the floor, wondering why I was doing this to my child and scolding myself for being a horrible parent. And then she would stop. And we would both get a couple of hours of sleep. The next morning, I would have hope that things would get better. I am happy to announce that, on day 4 of "L.A.C.I.O," she slept through the night. I am aware that this might be a fluke, since it's the first night she actually slept through, but I'm thankful nonetheless. I, on the other hand, have been up since 4:30 am. During this peaceful time when my baby was sleeping quietly, I was up every hour checking on her to make sure she was breathing. Apparently, the secret to getting Avery to sleep is letting her sleep on her stomach....with her face buried in the mattress. I've tried moving her face to the side, but to no avail. As soon as I let go, she'll move it right back. My pediatrician and nurse have assured me that, while panic-inducing for mommy, this is normal for baby and it's how Avery prefers to sleep. If she becomes too hot or can't breathe, she'll automatically move her face. I don't know if I believe it yet, so I'll probably still be up multiple times in the night checking on her. Baby steps people.....

In other news! I am on my way to fulfilling 3 of my "2012 Resolutions!" Yay, me!

1. Since I was up at 4:30, I was able to pack my lunch. This helps me check off 2 resolutions in one: lose weight and save money. No more McDonald's fries. No more $1 menu adding up to $15 a week.

{please don't judge my nasty sink....those are dishes from our corner cabinet that was cleaned out last night (post to come later)}

Doesn't it look yummy?! I'm actually looking forward to lunch today...something I normally dread. What's better than a balanced meal and a 3 Musketeer Truffle Crisp bar to reward myself?

2. I'm making dinner as we speak! How so? My Crock-Pot. A few days ago, I asked for some recipes for my long-neglected slow cooker and I was amazed at the responses and amazing recipes that followed. Last night, I cleared off some counter space and pulled out my Crock-Pot. Tonight, we'll be having Italian Chicken (thanks Ali Scott). It couldn't be easier...3 chicken breasts, bottle of Italian dressing, 6 hours. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Yay Crock Pots! Yay for resolutions! Yay for babies sleeping through the night!!! {if I could make that a thousand font in super bold, I totally would.} Happy Monday everyone!

In 2012, I resolve to drive myself crazy.

I know there's still a few days until the new year and the time for making resolutions for 2012 is a couple of days away, but I thought I would get a head start on making my (rather lengthy) list of resolutions. Here goes.

1. I WILL make dinner again. I love to cook. I don't have the skill to be able to whip something together from 5 ingredients in my pantry, but I can follow a recipe. And actually like doing it. There's nothing like the feeling of accomplishment when you sit down to a home cooked meal each night, knowing that your hands put together this meal (along with Pillsbury and Sara Lee--every cook needs a little help). I'm tired of eating out, I'm tired of seeing money disappear due to eating out. If I make dinner again six out of the seven nights a week, going out to a restaurant will become a treat again, not just a couple of times a week occurance like it is now. Cook dinner. No excuses.
2. This one's a little trickier.....lose weight. Now, I'm not naive enough to think that I'm going to get my fairly skinny pre-baby body back, but I would like to drop one more jean size and a few inches around the waist. Right now, I'm two sizes bigger than what I was before Avery. I would enjoy wiggling back into a size 6 jean and be perfectly content. This will be achieved through exercise. A tough one for me. I do not, in any way shape or form, have motivation to exercise. Even as a UK student, when the campus gym membership was FREE, I could not bring myself to put on work out clothes, drive to the gym, walk from the parking garage and work out. Not to mention how inadequate I felt being around those health nuts. Here I would be, huffing and puffing and close to death on the treadmill, while they barely broke a sweat running their third mile. No thank you. But I can do some form of a work out at home. Lift light weights with Marty. Do sit ups. Walk around our neighborhood. Too bad doing laundry and changing diapers doesn't burn more calories.....
3. Organize and clean my disgusting house. Listen. I'm a new mom. I'm exhausted 80% of the time. Currently, my attitude about cleaning house is that I don't have the energy to do it on a daily basis. I HAVE to get out of this mindframe. Instead of walking in the door and dumping everything on the kitchen table, I need to make the effort to put things away. Right now, when Avery goes to sleep around 8:30, I'm faced with the dilemma of chosing to accomplish things around the house that don't get done during the day or sleeping. 3 out of 4 times, sleeping wins. I know that my baby will be awake in a few hours (no, at 5 months old, we do not have a sleeping schedule figured out yet) and I want every precious hour of sleep that I can get. Instead, I need to accept the fact that I am not supposed to sleep during this period of Avery's life and start keeping my house neater. I'm not saying that I have to be an obsessive, oh-my-Lord-there's-dirt-on-my-floor-and-I'm-going-to-freak kind of person, but at least having my stuff put away would be a start. Then my 2013 goal can be to have a "Pinterest-esque" organized home.
4. Save money. This kind of goes hand-in-hand with the "cook more, eat out less" goal, but I need to stop buying things for myself. When I walk into Target, I usually peruse the clearance section of the women's clothes and shoes. Why? I have PLENTY of both. I don't need another black shirt or pair of flats. Make do with what I have. And I have some pretty great pieces in my closet that I haven't worn in awhile. And while I'm not buying clothes for myself, I need to stop randomly buying clothes for Avery. Believe it or not, this one will be harder to do. Baby girl clothes are sooooooo adorable. And so hard to pass up. But she's going to outgrow that onesie in 3 months...no matter how cute it is. She has two entire drawers full of onesies and a closet jam-packed of cute clothes. Stop. Buying. Baby clothes. Spend that money instead on formula and diapers. Or, better yet, put that money in Avery's college fund.
5. Be a better wife. Sometimes, I feel like with the crazy whirlwind that is my life of a mother with a 5 month old, my husband gets lost in the shuffle. We get up, we talk to Avery, we go to work, I pick up Avery, we get home, we play with Avery, we feed Avery, we put Avery to bed, I go to bed. I see very little "us" time in our current schedule. My husband has asked me several times to sit and watch a DVR'ed episode of "Mike and Molly" with him. I usually decline, opting instead to wash bottles or go to bed. What would thirty minutes of watching TV hurt? Especially when it means that I'm actually getting to spend uninterrupted time with Marty? I feel so frazzled most of the time with my new mom status and my inability to keep a clean house or do anything remotely domesticated anymore, that usually my frustrations come out on the target that's nearest....usually Marty. And I don't understand why. I'm so lucky to have a husband like I do. I hear stories of friends with babies whose husbands don't change diapers or clean up after themselves or do any type of housework in general. I have a husband that will change a diaper (although we're struggling with the dirty diapers right now), does his own laundry and will help me with housework when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Why don't I thank him more? This resolution should probably be moved up to the number 1 spot in importance.
6. Do more with Avery. I browse Pinterest probably once a week and find a million good ideas to do with or for your children. And I immediately pin it to my "Avery stuff" board and resolve that I will do those things for my little girl. Just like everything else, it gets lost in the hustle of our lives and the idea is quickly forgotten. Stop. Make moments count with Avery because she's only little once and I want her childhood to be as memorable as mine.
7. Figure out a way to balance this new-and-improved, domesticated, supermommy me, while also keeping time for myself. Since having Avery, I haven't been able to paint much. Mostly because I don't have the time, but also because my craft room/the office has officially become "the junk room." Don't judge me, I know you have one too. Avery in all her baby adorableness, arrived with a lot of stuff. In our house, that means very little place to keep it. We have a fairly small house with not much storage...few closets, no attic, no basement, no garage. This results in things being thrown in the office, because there is absolutely nowhere else for it to go. When I would walk into the office to relax and paint, I would become so overwhelmed by the clutter that I would immediately hyperventilate and walk back out. I will get this office cleaned, I will paint more, and I WILL find that "me" time that I've lost.

Okay. I'm done for now. There's a million other things that I'd love to list (organize our back porch, keep up with our landscaping, clean the front porch and put out chairs, start collecting antiques and incorporating them with the modern-ish pieces in our house, become a trend-setter and stop worrying what everyone thinks about my clothes and wear what makes me feel good (a.k.a. hats and dresses), make photo books, finish my dad's scrapbook, blog more) but I know that's not being realistic. Heck, out of the seven things I have listed, I'll probably be lucky to keep more than two of them for a few months. But I'm going to give it the old college try. Wish me luck. (and good luck to you in all your 2012 endeavors)

iPhone Apps without iTunes

With CopyTrans Manager, the FREE iTunes Alternative, you can now install apps on your iPhone, iPad, or iPod Touch. You no longer need iTunes or even Jailbreak fot that! There is a link to the freeware:

• iPhone apps without iTunes

All the features of CopyTrans Manager in a nutshell:

• Add songs, apps, videos, etc. from any PC to iPad, iPod Touch and iPhone
• Create and delete playlists or edit existing ones
• Drag & Drop songs directly into playlists
• Edit track information (artist, album, ratings, genre, etc.)
• Add missing album artwork automatically
• Browse by album, artist or any other tag
• Play songs and videos on any PC
• No installation required
• Sync instantly

Here is short video on the topic:

For the other way round, in order to backup your iPhone apps to your PC, check out CopyTrans:

• Copy iPhone Apps to iTunes